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Growing up, so many of my choices were made for me. When it was time to go to university, I was expected to become a doctor, lawyer, or engineer. So, instead, I went with what I saw as the unconventional path of aviation, not realizing until later that I’d still unconsciously picked a high-status job that my parents would accept.
I moved to the U.S. to study and discovered a world outside of the one I was raised in, where I enjoyed the idea of being an adult who was free to make my own choices. So I chose to continue to live here, and in doing so, I’d actually cornered myself. Aviation was a high-stress field that I didn’t completely love, but I devoted all my time and attention to it because of my fear of failure.
I never gave myself the space to figure out what I’d genuinely love to do. Instead, I’d say things like, “I can’t take a year to figure my life out because I’ll fall behind the curve.” Whatever that means.
Then, my dad’s health started to go downhill. And my career got to a point where my mental health began to suffer. I hit a wall and was forced to make changes.
I found a spiritual mentor who brought awareness to how imbalanced my life was. She helped me, through exercise and mind-body connection, to understand that life existed outside my job.
And when my dad passed away, the pits of grief broke me open to my core. It brought up emotions and memories that I hadn’t ever expressed but now had to revisit and move through. I had to be honest with myself and learn to prioritize rest and downtime to survive.
My dad’s passing also made me realize how life is just a thing we get to do. It’s so fleeting. You could be here one moment and then gone the next. We have to capitalize on the time we have here. We have to prioritize ourselves.
I began drowning out the background noise, and I knew that so many other women of color were working through the same things. We have so much to offer outside of who we’ve been told we are. None of us needed to walk this unconventional path alone.
That’s why I created Same Skin.
It’s a brave space where we can talk openly about the full spectrum of life, from the heaviest pains to the lightest of joys. I’ve learned that your people are out there—you just have to reconnect with your story, and in turn, you’ll attract your bigger SOUL family. That’s who you’ve found here, in the community at Same Skin.
You can follow my personal journey @bombay2brooklyn where I document my life in NYC – unapologetically and fashionably. I’m your Indian digital BFF!
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